We all have heard it time and time again, “Love hurts.” Some may see it as to love someone so much and seeing it end can be painful, but my experience hasn’t been much of that. The love I’ve experienced these past few months are best explained through the cross. The ultimate sacrifice. God humbling Himself down to our flawed human form and choosing to save us from our sinful selves. Choosing to give up His own life so we may live with Him forever in Heaven. This love that strikes me down unto my knees. Completely in awe of Christ hanging on a tree. This Love that I will never be able to comprehend for it is so beyond me and my humanness. But, oh, how my heart finds refuge in this Love.
To love someone means so many meanings in our world today. People use it to describe a song, food, act or person. And then it gets even more complicated. You have love for your best friend, your parents, an author; the list goes on and on. In the midst of all of this, it’s easy to lose sight of what it truly means to love someone. I got lost in the mix of it all and wasn’t sure how to love. I could no longer recognize the true Love in my life. Instead of loving those around me with my whole heart, I kept some of it for myself. I’m still not entirely sure why I did this, most likely a combination of fear and distrust. But it was incomplete and I could tell. Unfortunately, I wasn’t sure what to do to change this. Loving with my whole heart is what I always hope to do and work towards. But why was it so hard? I could not wrap my head around why this love for others wasn’t fulfilling my heart.
For some time, my heart was seeking. At the time I didn’t know what was going on, but I knew I wasn’t content. I had heard time and time again how much God loves me and how He died on the cross for ME. But by hearing it over and over again, the reality of that statement had lost its impact on me. It was common knowledge and more of a fact than a belief. But, God knew exactly how to show me the Love that has been freely given to me. He has blessed me with some incredible brothers and sisters in Christ. They never fail to be the light of Christ in my life and He’s used others to open my eyes to the Love which was given to us on the cross. Despite my attempts to push away those who love me, those friends rooted in Christ persevere and love me when it is hardest. Through little and big sacrifices that they bears to show me love, they point me to the cross and the love of Christ. The sacrifice that bears the weight of the world. As Jesus sacrificed His life, He has called us to love one another in the same way. Love is not all rainbows and fairy dust, it’s tough, exhausting, a sacrifice. Oh, but it hurts so good.